I've decided the world needs a double take.

I walk around campus and I see people with sullen expressions. They sit down every break they get between classes to just plain not think, and that's what they do. They don't think. They sit in little groups of their 'friends,' talking without thinking. They complain about how hard their life is. They complain about how their prof failed them on an assignment, even though it was totally not their fault that they had to go to the mall rather than study. They complain about how weird that girl in their calculus class is, and how she's obviously stupid and not worth being friendswith because she's got the highest marks. They talk about that dude over in the caf who always sits by himself like a nerd. And oh my gawd, did you hear about what his girlfriend did last year?

Get a hold of yourselves, people!

Take another look around! There is so much going on around you that you're completely unaware of!

I believe that happiness is something we create. -Sugarland

People tend to focus way too much on the negative things they see. They hardly ever say, oh, hey, that girl in calculus is always smiling. She must be really enjoying herself! No, that's not important.

By the way, YES. I know I am complaining. But here's where it stops. I love my friends. I love my life. I love the beauty in the people and nature around me. I love my Jesus. I love to hang out with people I know just to have a good time. When I get a break from classes I like to move around. You know: go for a walk, play some football or Frisbee on the front lawn, play some guitar in a sweet jam session.

I've heard it said that it takes more energy to frown than to smile. Have you ever tried pushing out your lower lip in a whimper and holding it there for an extended period of time? It's not easy, I kid you not. On the other hand, I find it quite easy to smile at people all day long when I see them. Even when I don't see them. I think about my friends and things we've done and I laugh out loud happily. Holy cow, life is amazing. Sometimes I wish I could just take out my eyes and stick them in some one else's head so that they would see the world the way I do.

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that there is no reasons to be unhappy. I mean, my grandpa passed away last year and I was pretty darn upset. In fact, I spent the majority of that day away from people, just walking around by myself, immersed in my own tears. I didn't want to see anyone. I didn't want to talk to anyone. I just wanted to be alone. What was cool though, is that I saw the bright side of even that situation. While I was walking along the side of a river that day a bible verse kept popping into my head, over and over.

This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it! -Psalm 118:24

My first reaction to this verse on this particular day was, "What reasons could I possibly have to be happy right now?" Well? Well God? What is it you're trying to tell me? But God's a pretty smart guy. He always knows what cheers me up. I looked around and I could see the river. I could see it's fast flowing water. I could see whitecaps as it flowed over rocks. I could see a leaf floating on top of it. I could see a fish swimming inside it. I could see colourful pebbles at the bottom. I could see the way each ripple moved and all I could think about was how cool it was that God had made something so beautiful. Then one of my friends found me a bit later and she told me a couple things that cheered me up as well. I realized how lucky I was to have friends who love and care about me.

I'm willing to bet you have friends like that as well. Open your eyes. Check out all the cool things you have in your life that you can be thankful for. Think about how much Jesus cares about you, and smile.

An Oyster?

Just a thought:

What would happen to us if we found out that the world is actually an oyster? It would completely change the way we view God. We are the pearl; the spit from the oyster, covering the grain of sand, the core. But now the protective shell is covering us, never letting anything else in, or us out. We now find ourselves in an interesting predicament. Do we let life go on as it is, or do we take a chisel and try to break free? Not that we are prisoners, not at all. But does curiosity overcome all else?

3.1415962

Just because it's the start of my favourite number and makes me feel a little more secure.

I'm definitely confused right now.

I have no place to live for the summer yet (that has been confirmed).

I am not done my taxes because I don't have the right papers (the gov't ones that amazingly enough don't come with the package, yet are required to fill out for students).

There's a guy on my mind who just won't leave my mind even though I already decided I don't want to like him.

I don't want to think about guys right now, so I'm angry cause I should be thinking of other things instead.

I want to go home. To BC. To my dog. To my life.

I want to take a break from school.

If I go home that means quitting my job right now, a job of which I adore, yet I have no place to live.

I miss my mom.

I don't feel good.

I suck at blogging so I'm probably gonna leave it at this for the next little bit. I know it's kind of depressing, but really, blogging is about sharing your feelings, and mine are freaking out right now. So it's pretty accurate. At least I'm truthful.

Have a happy Easter, for those of you who are living two days in the future.

"Brussel sprouts are not neutral."

"Indeed they are not, my dear Watson. If you don't like brussel sprouts and I put them in your mouth they cause trouble."

"If I take fertilizer and season your brussel sprouts with fertilizer, this is even less neutral."

Mmm... Brussel sprouts. I like 'em. I also like gherkins. Speaking of gherkins, I saw a giant one when I was in London, UK last May:

As you can see, it is not actually a pickle, but it is the Gherkin Building, and it kind of looks like a glass bullet. I'm not really sure what it's for, but I love gherkins, so I had to get a picture. I was craving gherkins today before my English final exam, which reminded me of this picture. That's the Tower of London in the foreground. Cool place. Lots of torture devices, as well as a couple jewels.

I feel like recording a song I wrote a while ago about the turn signal in my summer-2010-roommate's car. Wish me luck!

Race To Sleep

Hello Blog world (1)! I have just finished (2) an original song! I wrote it and performed it already (3)! It is called Race To Sleep. The lyrics were written by my friend Michelle. I played piano for it like an expert (4)! I feel so skilled (5) with music now that I'm half-way done my degree.

Legend:

(1) AKA Brittni

(2) 24 hours ago

(3) in the auditorium, when no one else was there

(4) I used 2 hands, but...

(5) I'm not skilled. There were only 5 notes and no chords. All easy stuff.

Runnin' through the fire, runnin' through the flames.

Tonight, as I was supposed to be doing homework, I had a nice, short conversation with Brittni (yeah, you! My only reader!), who was pretending to be a quote book saleswoman to sneak her way into my house. I was making my exit and said that I needed to go do my work, and on my way out I said "I have to go, but I'll leave you with this!" and with that I flipped to random page in her quote book and read the first thing I saw. It said something about a church and being destructive, but I hadn't realized that I had started reading in the middle of the sentence (it went from the bottom of one page to the top of the next), so it made no sense whatsoever and we both laughed. I tried again and this time flipped to this:

Have you not heard?

When a man marries, dies, or turns Hindoo,

his best friends hear no more of him.

-P. B. Shelly-

Makes sense. Hindoo = no more friendly contact. Definitely. I thought it fit the situation nicely (not really, but it was funny), so both of us burst out laughing and I made my way out of the room, bidding her adieu.

SO, uh, I'm in this happy state of homework induced delirium at the moment where I am terribly stressed, complaining about all my papers, and then going to my room and writing in here because I can't concentrate on my papers. I also went outside and drilled myself with soccer exercises like heading the ball, practicing my drop kick aim, and dribbling the ball down the sidewalk. It was a very fun hour out in the snowy weather. Kinda slippery, but that made it more interesting.

Anyway, this delirium allows me to think deeply on pretty much every subject except what I need to. It got me thinking. Living on campus of both a university and a high school means I see a lot of people, of various ages ranging from about 15 to 50. Every week day the high school students go on a rampage through our university cafeteria to get their lunches at about 11:30am. I see the girls go by in skirts that seem to get shorter and shorter every minute, shirts that open up more and more toward their cleavage, and faces so covered in make-up (not bad make-up, but still loads) that you can't tell what they would look like without it. They go through the line-up and take as small a portion of food as possible, with the least amount of fat. It looks like they're trying to starve.

Why do they do this to themselves? Well, media plays a huge roll. They see TV ads about make-up, clothing, games, and pretty much every thing else, and they're always sporting girls that are dolled up and "sexy"-looking. The ads say visually that the only way people will like you is if you dress and act like the skinny, beautiful models they show. This is what my generation is. They are zombies, following the latest trends to be popular because they're afraid others won't like them. They're afraid the one zit on the forehead will make the person they like think they're gross. They're afraid to do anything out of the ordinary because they might be thought of as weird.

They're afraid to be themselves.

John Butler Trio is one of my favourite bands. They take situations like these and have no problem exposing the ideas as silly through their music.

Here's one that addresses the self-image issue: "To Look Like You"

This one talks about the drugs and addiction issue: "Used to Get High"

This one tells us to be happy with what we've got, rather than envying what others have. Just because someone has something you don't doesn't mean they've got it easier. "Better Than"

no longer a nutmeg grater, but now an abortive hedgehog!

I haven't written in a very long time. Like, over a month. And it's about 23:30 right now, and I have class at 08:00. So really I should be sleeping. But I don't feel like it. I feel like organizing my thoughts.

I have a question: If one were to figure out that one could move the left side of one's rib cage separate from the left with nothing other than chest muscles, what could one do with this talent?

So today I started up a dance class of my own. I'm not getting paid for it yet, it's just a fun thing. I am teaching the two people who showed up how to bellydance. They learned things like shimmies, snake arms, belly rolls, and hip circles today. Good progress. I'm hoping that after a few classes they will be ready to learn an actual choreography.

One of my friends gave me a mix CD that he created and so far I am enjoying it. There is a bit on it that's not my favourite, but the majority is great. Like the fact that I'm not that big of a fan of Kanye West, because he's got a lot of rap in his music. I don't really like rap. But man! There is some great music on here. I've got some new favourites. It's got Sufjan Stevens, Arcade Fire, Kanye West, Elliott Smith, LCD Soundsystem, The Roots, Broken Social Scene, Chromeo, Bright Eyes, Neon Indian, Stars, and Yann Tiersen. Good variety. And Chromeo is stuck in my head yet again. I shake my fist at you, mister! :D

Mmmmmmmmaking progress with a dude. A handsome dude. A dude who is super nice. And so far we have several things in common. As well as several things not in common, but I think that's healthy. We'll see where it goes; I mean, I'm still just getting to know him. But I kinda like him more than a friend. Not sure totally, but I feel something. Anywho. It doesn't matter until a date happens, if it does. ...That was rather open of me. I don't usually post that kind of thing on the net. But it's okay I suppose, because there's nothing in there to give away his identity.

I'm listening to Sufjan Stevens' song again: "Futile Devices." Great song.

Hey! Tomorrow I perform with Erika! It's the choir's annual silent auction, so Erika is playing piano for me and we're singing a song together as part of the entertainment. There's also unlimited cupcakes, which might draw more people than our entertainment would... haha. I can't wait! Then after that a party! Fun stuff!

Anyway, I should probably get to sleep. Ta ta for now.